She Was ...

She was the one that was supposed to be,
and she was for a while.
She was strong and bold, and smart,
she told me that i could dream any dream and make it come true
i believed her, i believed you...
I had my faults, but thought you would stay through them
I thought you would fight for me, for us, but you didnt.
you quietly walked away....but i'm not mad...only sad
sad at what could have been, what should have been...
and still so very hopeful that what could have been, what should have been
will be
...in the meantime, i keep taking my steps forward and on occasion, yes i do look back...
because to keep looking ahead hurts way more than i care to experience...or maybe i'm backwards and
im looking back to keep myself from forgetting the love that i had that made me feel so so alive.

i dont know, but i do know she was supposed to be .... and now she's not...

Smile

I smile each day. 

Even though there is a part of me that is hurting ... I smile. 
I think of you and smile and while a tear falls from my eye ... i smile.
My heart feels like its missing a piece, you stole a part of me and yet ... i smile.
I remember you telling me you wanted to stand in the fire with me, but you're gone
you told me that you wouldnt leave, you werent going anywhere, but you're gone.
AND even in that knowing ... i smile.

I smile because YOU have inspired me to be an amazing woman, i smile because you believed in me, i smile because you KNEW me and i didnt have to tell you much about me or what i liked or who i was...YOU

SAW

ME

and now you're gone, and I still smile.