List of Intentions

Dear God & Spiritual Team, I ask that you provide my List of Intentions for my highest good:

That my Travel and Event planning business starts to get on its way.
that it is not stressful, but fun, and i dont feel like its a job, my hours are flexible, i'm out and about and not stuck behind a desk and can charge an amount and feel good about it because i am worth it. 
I get started in my classes and can add photography to the list of things i offer.
Things become clearer and my intuition stronger.
I create my to do list and am able to take care of those things.
That i recieve the money for all necessary expenditures.
Money flows easily to me.
I am able to remodel my home.
I have a loving, supportive relationship that supports me in ALL areas of my life and is fully accepting of who I am.
I am able to attend any and all workshops, networking and coaching events without worrying about the cost.
I am able to provide the structure and discipline Jalen needs for these next 4 years in high school.
That love continues to surround me and my family.
That the loan modification goes through and my mortgage goes down $500.

Realize

You know sometimes it not that you no longer love the person you're with.  Sometimes its that you no longer can tolerate who you become when you're with that person.  Not that you dont love that person any longer, but that maybe you're compromising who you are to get approval from that person.  Sure we all want approval from outside sources.  I believe thats just human nature and it starts when we are kids, but honestly, the only approval I need is from myself.  What a freeing discovery and it comes at the ripe young age of 48. 

Shining my light

If you never look for the light you will never find the light...I am the light and I will continue to see the light, be the light and look for more light...

This is me..

Loving, funny, grouchy, naive, sensitive, silly, affectionate, a loner, cynical, openminded, lover of books, a mommy, a gramma, i am quiet and talkative, i am needy and spoiled, i want alone time and to be with others.  It all sounds contridictory, but it is all me and then some...and i love it all...

My friend

I read my friends blog today.  What a story of love, of hope, of despair, but mainly a story of love.  You know i've posted many blogs about broken heart and love, but really its not quite the same.  Sure, I love her, but this other type of love is so unselfish.  So not about me and so about just compassion, human spirit, human solidarity.  When i think about it thats whats missing from the world today.  Everyone is just out for themselves, but not my lil skittles. (LOL) Nope she is a lover of the world and probably most everyone.  Tonight reading her blog has shifted me in ways that i can't explain.  I know this much...while i've always known that everyone has a story and i've typically rarely judgemental of homeless people, from now on i will do my best when the opportunity presents itself to form a connection, to do something different...to be that human that wants solidarity with someone that is different from her.  To really be LOVE.

all wrong

i've been coming at this all wrong...i'm posting heartache, sadness, lack, scarcity...but there is so much more.  So much i'm grateful for...so much i am in love with.  My life, my children, my grandchildren....My family/friends.  Its really a beautiful life and i'm not taking it taking it for granted any longer.

Letting go

It started with “I suggest you start letting go”


Those words pierced my heart

In that moment I thought I might fall to pieces

Recognizing that I must indeed let go

“God, please help me!!” I begged for her strength to get me through

There was though, peace in that clarity

Enough peace for me to start to see, really see

That in that letting go was the new beginning

“God, you have shown me a whole new beginning”

A new way to be, to love, to see, to share

I embraced that new beginning

decided that I was only letting go of what didn’t work

what was unhealthy, what was broken, what was old

and time start over with what I finally got to see

a new beginning to rediscover love

to begin love anew

for our souls to once again speak to one another

as they have before

in this new beginning way

where only love can prevail

in the most vulnerable of ways

what a blessing that day

the day you suggested I start letting go